Lost Desires
by crzdqt
Summary: Once Kagome told Inuyasha of her feelings, her life has never been the same. Inuyasha had turned her down. And now Kagome seems to think theres no reason to do anything. Song Fic to 'I miss you so much' by TLC.
1. part one

Lost desires Song fict. Inuyasha  
  
'I never asked for this feeling'  
  
'I never thought I would fall'  
  
"I miss him."  
  
Kagome cried out, as images of her lost love became clear and understanding. She and Inuyasha had been so close, but the only thing was that her love for Inuyasha was kept a secret for so long that once she had told him, it hurt her so much to hear him say that his feelings for her were strictly friendly. From then on, they went there separate ways.  
  
Sense then Kagome lost all reason to do anything. She felt worthless and unloved. Though Sango had tried so hard to help her out, Kagome was lost of all feeling.  
  
"Kagome!" Sango stood at the door with a perturbed look on her face. "What are you still doing in bed? Its 2 in the afternoon. Get up" Sango walked over to Kagome and sat beside her. "I know it's hard on you but It's been a month." Sango took a hold of Kagome's tear struck face. "You'll be ok, I know it hurts but you got to move on. It's for the best." Kagome shook her head and buried her scream of depression in her pillow. "That's it. Tonight I'm setting you up with a blind date, but first you need a shower." Sango took a hold of Kagome and walked her to the bathroom. Kagome struggled.  
  
"Sango, I don't want to. NO! He was the only one for me. I can't just wash my feelings for him away." Kagome cried out as she clung to the rim of the bathroom door.  
  
"No, but you can wash away the smell." Sango eventually got Kagome off the door and into the shower. Even with Kagome's clothes on, Sango knew that a shower would help. Sango turned on the cold water and made Kagome stand there while the water poured on her.  
  
'I never knew how I felt'  
  
'Till the day you were gone' 'I was lost'  
  
Inuyasha sat alone in front of the television watching football. But as a commercial appeared on the screen. Inuyasha gasped. The ad was for a new movie coming out. A walk to remember.  
  
Flashback  
  
Kagome sat quietly beside him on the couch watching the previews for A walk to remember.  
  
"Inuyasha, do you want to go see that movie with me when it comes out?" She asked while starring down at her feet.  
  
"Sure." He replied. But once he looked over he got a shocking surprise. Kagome was so close to his face that he could feel her breath.  
  
'Oh I hope he'll like this' Kagome leaned forward and kissed him.'  
  
End  
  
Before the preview finished, Inuyasha was already out the door.  
  
'I never asked for red roses'  
  
'I wasn't looking for love'  
  
Inuyasha walked steadily towards his best friends' house. He had to get his mind off Kagome. And what better way to do that then to go joke with his perverted friend, Maroku. As he walked, his mind wandered. 'Why do I feel like this? I don't love her, do I? No I cant. I can't love.'  
  
"Yo, Inuyasha!"  
  
Inuyasha only lifted his head to look up at Maroku. Maroku noticed his strange behavior, "What's getting you down? That pour girl that you hurt still buggen you?" When Inuyasha didn't answer, Maroku decided to take matters into his own hands. "Inuyasha, I have a great idea. You and me and two hott chicks."  
  
'I don't think I could do that, something in my heart is tellin my to go to Kagome. Does this mean what I think it means? Do I love her? But I guess she's not interested in me anymore. I hurt her so bad she must hate me now. I guess I'll have to move on.'  
  
Somehow I let my emotions take hold  
  
and guess what all at once  
  
I'm in love  
  
"Kagome, I just got off the phone with Maroku. One of his friends is going to take you out tonight. I don't know who he is but Maroku says he thinks you'll really like him." Sango walked in behind Kagome who was sitting at her vanity putting on earrings that her one true love had given to her, Sango had a hand full of bobby pins with her to help Kagome hold up he curls with.  
  
Flashback  
  
Kagome pulled away just to see a very shocked Inuyasha. A rush of adrenaline hit her; right away she knew from that moment on, her life would be for better or worse. The spark between them made Kagome's stomach turn. They were destined to be together.  
  
"Inuyasha, there's something id like to tell you." When Inuyasha didn't reply, Kagome went on. "I love you."  
  
End  
  
Once Sango left to go get more bobby pins, Kagome tore through her draws, looking for her prized possession. She looked long and hard.  
  
"Is this what your looking for?" Sango appeared in the doorway, one hand full of bobby pins and the other hand holding a golden locket.  
  
"Sango, give that to me!"  
  
"Do you really believe that you're going to go out with this guy with Inuyashas face hanging around your neck?" Sango threw Kagome the locket. "If you want to jeopardize the date, wear it. But I suggest you don't." Kagome pocketed the locket. 'At least I can have it in my pocket, that way he'll always be with me.'  
  
Oh I miss you so much  
  
I long for your love  
  
It's scares me  
  
Cuz my heart gets so weak  
  
That I can't even breathe  
  
How can you take things so easily  
  
Baby why aren't you missing me?  
  
Kagome dressed in a tight red kamodo, the kind of dress that fits the curves so perfectly that heads would turn. But once she enters the restaurant, a familiar sent drifted past her, catching her attention. She was drawn to this young man in red slacks and a white shirt. His hair shining silver in the restraunt atmosphere. She wandered closer, feeling her heart skip a beat. She notices that he is not alone, but with her cousin, Kikyo. The stunning gentleman turns to Kagome's cousin. As his face comes in view, Kagome whimpered. The hansom young man was no other then inuyasha himself. Kagome turned on her heels and stormed off. She's about to leave the restaurant when Sango blocks her path.  
  
"Kagome, you can't leave yet. He hasn't even arrived. Come on, ill get you a drink while you wait for your date."  
  
Kagome turns around again to find that this time a hostess is in her way now.  
  
"My I show you to your table?" She asks politely.  
  
"No, I was just about to..." Sango cuts her off in mid sentence. "Thank you." Sango blurts out.  
  
Kagome is led to her table that is placed right in front of the bar, exactly were inuyasha is seated. Kagome buries her head in her menu to hide herself from Inuyasha's sight. Only to look over her menu but once to see Inuyasha staring straight at Kikyo.  
  
Why did I act like you mattered  
  
It was silly of me to believe  
  
That if I just opened my heart  
  
Things would come naturally  
  
Jokes on me (yeah)  
  
"So, as I was saying... My life in Florida was..." Kikyos voice drifts off. Inuyasha's attention had now been drawn to the table placed in front of him. As if fate had brought them together, Inuyasha stared at the most beautiful flower that was seated at that table.  
  
"Kagome?"  
  
"Inuyasha? Are you listening to me?" When Inuyasha didn't answer, Kikyo stood up abruptly, turned on her heels and walked off.  
  
I did not ask for love letters  
  
So why did you give them to me  
  
How could I let your intentions  
  
Get hold over me  
  
So in love  
  
So naive (oh baby)  
  
Inuyasha stood up, as if he was hipmotized, and took the seat next to her. Kagome looked up only to see a very depressed inuyasha. Kagome stared at him, studding his face for any emotion. It seemed like forever before Kagome Drifted from his gaze. She stood up slowly, letting inuyasha take full view of her. He walked to her and gently kissed her cold hardened lips. As he deepened the kiss, Kagome whimpered under his arms. She pressed gently against him and broke the kiss. She stepped back to take a glance at a very confused inuyasha, before turning around to run off to the ladies room.  
  
Inuyasha quickly and aggressively grabbed her arm. At that moment, something fell from her pocket as she spun around just to show him her tear struck face. Her gaze on him made his hand leave her arm. She turned quickly and ran off.  
  
Inuyasha sat down gently in her chair. As he looked down at his feet, he noticed the thing that she dropped was very familiar to him. He clutched it in his hand and brought it up to his face. When he opened his hand, he was relieved to find that the precious gift he had given her the first time he met her was lying in his palm. He opened the locket to find his picture had been replaced by a picture of them together. Some words had been engraved on the locket.  
  
'From my one and only love, who I will always cherish.'  
  
Inuyasha looked up towards the ladies restroom and grinned.  
  
And oh how I hate what you have done  
  
Made me fall so deep in love  
  
Got no cure  
  
You're the only one I want  
  
That I love oh baby  
  
He got up and ran as fast as he could, after Kagome. Once at the door of the ladies room, inuyasha took a deep breath and entered the room. The walls were covered in beige tile and the floors made of pure porcelain. He checked under all of the stalls and found only one person leaning against the inside of one. Inuyasha drifted over to the stall she had barricaded herself in. Inuyasha gently opened the door just to find it was locked. He rattled it for a few seconds until he heard Kagome cry out "Some ones in here!" after a while inuyasha rattled it again. This time Kagome cracked open the door to yell once again that she was in there, only to find a hand thrust open the door.  
  
"Inuyasha?"  
  
Inuyasha knelt down and took a hold of Kagome's hand. He stared up at her for the longest time before he finally slipped his hand into his pocket and grabbed out something small and delicate. He looked up at her once again and slipped the piece of jewelry into her hand. He then got up and walked out of the room and out of the restaurant.  
  
Kagome was stunned. She opened her hand to find the locket. Once she opened it she found that the words that were engraved in the locket had been added to.  
  
'From my one and only love, who I will always cherish, and never forget!'  
  
Kagome jumped up and bolted out the door. She ran after Inuyasha. Once outside she noticed that he was walking away from the restaurant and towards his home. She ran out, tears streaking down her face.  
  
"Inuyasha!"  
  
As he turned around, the ground shook, and lightning struck. Rain was falling, drenching Kagome from head to toe. Kagome cried out again, but this time to be drowned out by the thunder. It was too late. Inuyasha had already turned back around.  
  
"I love you!" Kagome whispered as she watched her one true love leave her life forever.  
  
Baby why aren't you missing me?  
  
Baby why aren't you missing me? 


	2. part 2

Oh my love

Britney Spears

Natasha Song Fic.2

__

I'm sitting here alone up in my room

and thinking about the times that we've been through (oh my love)

I'm looking at a picture in my hand

trying my best to understand

I really wanna know what we did wrong

with the love that felt so strong

Her breathing was hoarse and rasp. As she ran, Kagomes mind drifted. She remembered all the good times she had with him. All the times they had shared. For what. To end up running away from him. But now, everything was different. She was now running after her beloved Inuyasha.

Drenched, Kagome arrived at her destination. She breathed deeply in front of a small house with white walls and gray roofing. A sidewalk led to the wood door. Kagome took one last deep breath and walked up to the same door she had done many times before. But now, her reason for being there was greater then the last.

Her heart pounded as she reached for the door handle. Surprisingly, Inuyasha had left it open. As she opened the door slightly, she listened for any sounds of protest. She threw the door open only to revile a very empty house. All the walls were stripped of there coating. The furniture that had once been placed in a very unfinished way was now no where to be found. The only thing left was a key and a contract.

Kagome pocketed the key. She then turned to the contract.

"huh… Inuyasha!"

Kagome dropped to her knees to cry. But at the sound of movement, Kagome bolted into the living room. What she saw was Miroku. Miroku noticed her, and the contract she held in her hand.

"So, I guess you already know then. Inuyasha is moving. He's going to go to collage." Miroku sighed with guilt. "He should have told you. You should have never have found out like this."

Kagomes eyes widened as the events deepen into her mind.

__

if only you were here tonight

I know that we could make it right

I don't know how to live without your love

I was born to make you happy

'cause your the only one within my heart

I was born to make you happy

"Kagome. You should be happy for him. He's going for collage. He's changing his life. He wants to do something with it." Miroku knelt down by Kagome. As she looked down at her feet, Miroku stroked her hair with his hand, comforting her.

Gently, Kagome pushed his hand away, got up and walked out on a very guilty looking Miroku. As she got to the drive way, Miroku was already standing at the open door, watching Kagome walk off into the rain. Kagome stopped dead in her tracks. She looked up to the sky, and stared into the rain. Drops of water fell all around her. Her face was drenched with tears of sorrow and shock. Miroku stared at her. All of a sudden, Kagome fell to the ground.

"Kagome……."

__

always and forever you and me

thats the way our life should be

I don't know how to live without your love

I was born to make you happy

"Is she ok……." Sounds of faint voices clogged Kagomes mind. Her head hurt and her heart felt like she had just sent an arrow through it. She had no idea where she was, or what she was doing. More voices drifted around. Crowds of people joined.

"She'll be alright…….." Another faint but familiar voice became more clear. "She just fainted. She's really taking it hard."

"Sango…." Kagome whispered loud enough for only the voice to hear.

"Kagome, its me. You'll be………………" The voice drifted off as Kagome fainted once again.

"Inuyasha!" A very young girl at the age of 10, yelled with all her might. "Inuyasha." This small girl ran up to a young boy at the age of 12 with silver hair. His eyes were golden orbs, and his expression was playful and sweet. As the two met in a field of flowers, they embraced.

"Ill never leave you Kagome, Ill always protect you." They stood there holding each other as the scene blurred and became a memory.

"Ah…" Kagome sat up with a jolt only to be pushed back down by the rush of blood to her head. 'It was only a dream.'

__

I know I've been a fool since you've been gone

I'd rather give it up then carry on (oh my love)

'cause livin' in a dream of you and me

is not the way my life should be

I don't wanna cry a tear for you

so forgive me if I do

since that incident, Kagome was never the same. When she walked, she always looked down, and rarely spoke. It had been nearly 3 weeks since then, and still no rise in her personality. Though sango had sent her on many dates, Kagome came home the same way every time, bored and tear struck.

Sango had set her on a date tonight, and she paced rapidly around her room, waiting for her roommate, Kagome, to come home from her date with Hojo. It was 12 o'clock and still no Kagome. Sango glanced out the window once again. The sky was dark and the window was streaked with drops of rain. The apartment shook with the sound of thunder. Sango was worried. 'What happened to her?' once again, Sango paced around the room only to hear soft sobbing from outside. She rushed to the window, only to find a soaked girl walking by with tears coming down her face.

"Kagome!"

Sango burst out the door. She ran up to Kagome and pulled her inside with her and just held her while she cried.

"God. Kagome. You've got to get over it." Sango held her in her arms while she whispered concern into her ears. As kagome cried, sango stroked her hair like Miroku had done. This made Kagome scream in depression and pain. She jolted from Sangos grip, and ran back outside.

__

if only you were here tonight

I know that we could make it right

I don't know how to live without your love

I was born to make you happy

'cause your the only one within my heart

I was born to make you happy

Kagome ran for miles. Tears ran down her face as she ran. Going around a corner, Kagome ran into something. She was hit so hard that it sent her flying to the ground. When she looks up, she saw a young man with silver hair. Kagome stared at the young face also drenched in rain. His expression was weak but caring. He reached down to help her up.

Kagome jerked away on instinct. Something in her told her to leave, and fast. But he grabbed her arm forcefully and yanked her to him. The aggressiveness of his touch brought back memories of the past. She remembered the same touch. The same feeling of care and regret. She remembered him again. After so long of trying to forget him. She remembered. And started crying because of it.

"Get away from me……" Kagome pushed him away. As she turned on her heels she herd a very unfamiliar voice call out to her.

"Miss…… Miss….?" The young man, who she had imagined as Inuyasha was just being helpful. Meaning her no harm. Seeing what she had done, she was embarrassed. Kagome yelped a small regret and ran off again.

always and forever you and me

thats the way our life should be

I don't know how to live without your love

I was born to make you happy

Her mind wonders as she runs through the rain. Her heart beating at the thought of her beloved Inuyasha. 'Why can't I get over him? Why did he kiss me and just leave? I don't understand. He knows I love him. But yet, he's gone.' Kagome finds herself at the edge of lookout point, the tallest cliff in Chicago. Her feet inch towards the edge as she remembers how much she loved him, how much it hurt for him to leave. she falls into a dream as she wishes she could fly above this world. Fly to a place where she is loved. Where he loves her. As her dream builds in her mind, her body begins to fall off of lookout point. Her dream takes her to a place beyond her life, beyond love.

Just as she begins to feel again, she is ripped away from her world and sent back to reality, where she finds herself staring at the water below. All of a sudden, blood rushes to her heart as she's pulled away from the terrible nightmare. Thrown into warm arms.

Kagomes life had been on the line, and she herself had cut the rope. Her tears streamed down her face, and her heart was beating in her ears. She had been saved from the cliff. But who? Her face was still buried in the chest of her savor. She looked up only to find herself in the arms of Inuyasha.

__

I'd do anything

I'd give you my world

I'd wait forever

to be your girl

just call out my name (just call out my name)

I will be there (and I will be there)

just to show you how much I care

She tried to tear away from his grip, only to find that his grip held her too hard and too close. He hugged her. Her mind rushed, her heart beating, her love regained. But what was he doing here. Why did he save her. How did he know.

"Kagome....."

She looked up once more to find her golden orbs staring into her hazel eyes.

I don't know how to live without your love

I was born to make you happy

'cause your the only one within my heart

I was born to make you happy

"Inuyasha, you came back for me!"

"Kagome......." Inuyasha stared at her from what seemed like ages. Her mind kept going over all of what happened. "I love you....... Kagome." Her heart raced as he leaned in to kiss her. There lips met with such passion that she knew he would always protect her. He would always be there for her. She pulled away, and rested her forehead against his.

"I love you Inuyasha............. I always have."

Kagome smiled. For the first time in months, Kagome smiled.

I was born to make you happy


End file.
